SingleGirl: Frog Kissing
Posted by SingleGirl - 26/07/10 at 08:07 am
(courtesy of gettysgirl on flickr)
So, I know we’re supposed to kiss a lot of frogs and all that but I’m starting to wonder where that expression comes from (ok, ok, it comes from the Frog Prince, I know, but hear me out). Here’s my question. When you kiss a frog, it shouldn’t FEEL like a frog, should it? I’m of the opinion that first kisses should start out sweet and chaste and then maybe bring on some heat towards the close. Leave you wanting more. So what do you make of a BAD first kiss? Does it mean anything? Is kissing something that you can be good or bad at? Or is it more a question of kissing compatibility?
I’m on my 2nd date with JockBoy which took a week and a half due to mutual scheduling issues. And we have a GOOD night but not as great as I’d hoped. I have this sense that we’ve lapsed back to the first phase where you have to restart the progression from polite conversation to flirty banter. Still, there are highlights. He compliments me on my outfit (I beam!) and little physical touches here and there –something I already love about him.
As the night comes to a close, we are strolling around and running out of obvious conversation topics. It’s a weeknight so I can’t linger too much longer but I’m hoping he’ll say something about setting up the next date (after all, I don’t want to go through the torture of last week where I was waiting and wondering!). And then the moment comes where he pauses as if to ask me something, and I know he’s about to say something about having a great time and wanting to do it again soon. Finally he looks at me and smiles and says,
“Do you want to come back to my place?”
whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?
Hey, if there are any guys reading this, please chime in here. Because as a woman, I read this as code for sex (or at least a heavy hook-up) and its only date 2. I give him the benefit of the doubt that he didn’t know how jarring that would sound in my ears (the loop in my head goes something like, what does he take me for? A slut? Did I somehow give out the signal that I am looking for casual sex? Is that all HE’S after?). I know people have different policies on when they’re ready to hook up but for me, date 2 is far too soon. So really, even if he’s dying to show me his new kitchen remodel, I’d rather he save it for dates 4+.
What I actually SAY to him is,”Um…………. I would love to see your place but maybe we can save that for another time?”
So instead he drives me home and then we’re back to the scene of the crime from date 1 where the infamous kiss and date plan did NOT take place as I’d hoped/expected. But this time, I know he is into me. All the little signs are there and I’ve now concluded that he and I must be playing by different dating rule books. More specifically, I am playing by dating rules and he is not. So I do something uncharacteristic and say, “So! Am I going to see you again?” Looking dumbfounded, he says, “Um, yeaaaa-AH” (with the tone of “OF COURSE, duh!”). Schedules are discussed and then finally the kiss arrives.
It starts out well enough but somewhere between seconds 1 and 15, things go from “polite” to “warp speed” and suddenly there is too much tongue, too much pressure, too much of too much!
I walk away confused, thinking, heeeeeeeey, is this becoming a physical thing? How dare he stick his tongue down my throat on our first kiss? and yet another part of me is thinking,
DAMN. This thing has got some heat to it.
Until next time, date 3 is in the works. Stay tuned and wish me luck!
